Saturday, December 31, 2011

saving the worst till last

Well, here we are at the final cookbook.  Possibly the worst cookbook in the world.

And this is possibly the most disgusting food I have prepared.  Not just this year, but any time in my life.

Thank you to the friends who gave me this book.  I will never use it again.

Here is the sequence of assembly of the most unpleasant biscuit treat ever devised.  And yet I did eat it.

Sweet 'n' Salty Tea Sandwiches from Baltz, E. Junk Foodie: 51 delicious recipes for the lowbrow gourmand Adams Media 2010

Modifications: Used Tiny Teddies, Smiths chips and Kewpie mayonnaise.
Verdict: Just. Awful. (Actually, she said "Not too bad at all, really." - the Fella)

That's all for tonight. 

Happy New Year everybody, and I'll be back soon with reflections on this year.  I'm far too tired and full tonight.


These were chosen solely because they were the least complicated thing in the book.

Twice Dipped Strawberries from Sutherland Smith, B. Chocolates & Petits Fours Golden Press 1986

Modifications: None.
Verdict: Fine. 

custardy battle

One more exciting element of tonight's dining.

Custard Sauce from Culinary Arts Institute: 150 Delectable Dessert Recipes Consolidated Book Publishers 1975

Modifications: None.
Verdict: Custardy.

potatoes. again.

So I says to the Fella, I says, "Can you please choose something for me to cook from this cookbook?"

And the Fella says, "Why coytainly, nyuk nyuk nyuk!"

And then he chooses potatoes, because that's what he always does.

But he did explain that we had to have something from the New Year's Eve party part of this magnificent cookbook.  I would have liked to have had the time to organise a whole dinner party around this book, but that will have to wait until next year.

So potatoes are part of the strange mixture of things we are eating tonight.

Many thanks to Jen for giving me this book.  I promise to make fuller use of it later.

Jacket Potatoes from Pan H. The Australian Hostess Cookbook Nelson

Modifications: None.
Verdict: It might be the vellinis talking, but these were fantastic.

drinky poo

This is a very nice way to celebrate New Year.

And it's really helping to dull the doof-doof music shaking our walls from the party across the road.

Vellini from Shaken: 250 very sexy cocktails Murdoch Books 2004

Modifications: Used raspberry liqueur.  All fruit tastes the same anyway.
Verdict: Super.  I think I shall have another.

six more things to eat that we did not need to eat

I don't have time to think of a witty introduction to this post for you.  Here are things I cooked over the past couple of days.  They were good. You should try them.

Must. Keep. Cooking.

Buttered Nut and Lentil Dip from Ashworth, S. Vegetarian Barbecues The Book Company International 1995

Modifications: None.
Verdict: Really good.

More recipes follow...


Last night we ate this glorious pudding.

I have become quite skillful at using three cookbooks to create a single dish.

It is a useless skill, and one that I will never need again after midnight tonight.

Tipsy Sticky Date Pudding from Family Circle: Sticky and Steamed Puddings Murdoch Books 1999

Modifications: Made butterscotch sauce below instead of suggested syrup.  Halved recipe and made in two small tins so one can be frozen in readiness for the zombie apocalypse.
Verdict: Amazingly good.

Butterscotch Sauce from Fulton, M. Margaret Fulton's Book of Ices & Cold Desserts Octopus 1983

Modifications: None.
Verdict: Tooth-dissolvingly sweet, but just divine on the pudding.

Mascarpone from Willman, N. & C. Home Cheesemaking: the secrets of how to make your own cheese and dairy products (2nd edition) Neil & Carole Willman 2005

Modifications: None.
Verdict: Did not set as firmly as it should have, but I didn't want to add too much more tartaric acid because I was starting to taste it.  Ended up more like double cream, but was still an excellent accompaniment to the pudding.